"Ego says, 'Once everything falls into place, I’ll feel peace.' Spirit says, 'Find your peace, and then everything will fall into place.'" - Marianne Williamson
Living with ease doesn’t mean sleeping late every day, becoming a beach bum, or forgetting your responsibilities. Although these may be helpful short term practices to balance over-exertion.
In essence, living with ease requires a delicate balance that includes both relaxation and alertness. If you’re over-relaxed on a regular basis you’ll slump into sleepiness or inertia. If you’re too alert, you’ll feel wound up and ready to snap.
“When we are relaxed and happy, there is a gentle rhythm back and forth between the two branches [of the nervous system], undulating between automatic charge and discharge, and between arousal and relaxation. This gentle rhythm gives us a sense of well-being and success in managing our lives.” - Gina Ross, Beyond the Trauma Vortex, Into the Healing Vortex.
Every individual varies in terms of the amount of stimulation he or she needs, wants, or can tolerate. The same goes for relaxation. Living with ease means finding your own sweet spot, which blends a good mix of serenity with a sense of being awake in the world.
Have you found the right balance for you?
Be Intentional to Turn the Tide of Stress
In modern life, we’re encouraged to be on almost all the time. The advent of mobile phones and social media has pushed us into manic interaction with little relief, amping up stress levels to never-before-seen proportions.
But don’t we personally admire - even prefer - people who can accomplish with a sense of relaxed easiness, people who seem well in their skin, people who embody carefree dignity?
Some people may have been born with easygoing genes, but for most of us learning to live with ease requires an intentional process. It means turning the tide of stress, which might feel off-putting at first if you're used to letting it flow. But what could be more enjoyable than learning to relax?
What Does It Mean to Live with Ease?
This is what living with ease means to me:
- You take responsibility for your thoughts, emotions, words, and actions rather than placing blame on others.
- You know your stress triggers and have adapted your life accordingly.
- You’re aware of your personal early warn signs of stress and are willing to act in advance before stress forms into an avalanche.
- You’ve learned and implement preventative relaxation strategies so your nervous system stays in balance or returns to calm soon after distress occurs.
- You’re compassionate towards yourself rather than giving yourself a hard time.
- You politely say no when your boundaries are violated.
- You know and respect your limits.
- You pay attention to signs from your body.
- You follow your intuition without ignoring your intellect.
- You’re open to looking at your deeper patterns that invisibly encourage operating in stress mode.
You can use this as a checklist to gently monitor your progress towards living with ease. Add in any elements that I may have missed, especially ones that hold crucial importance for you.
Consider:
- Would you really like to have more ease in your life?
- What does “living with ease” mean to you?
- What three steps can you take to get there?
Of course, you have to learn each one of these attitudes or skills and it takes time. So please don’t have unrealistic expectations. Just work with one at a time and you'll gradually find more ease arising in your life.
Notice Stress to Dissolve Stress
Over the next few days, whenever angst, worry, or stress begins to arise in your life, just notice. Noticing is powerful and can start to shift the pattern of stress. It will help you begin to take responsibility for your stress response.
Don’t reprimand yourself when these feelings arise. Instead, simply be curious. Question the power stress wields in your life. Don’t just accept your stress response as an inevitable fact.
You have the capacity to live with ease. It begins by saying, “Yes, I will.”
Give Yourself the Gift of Ease
Living with Ease offers a complete road map to help you dissolve stress and prevent it from overpowering you again. The course will help you to
- Identify your stress triggers and early warning signs.
- Look deeply at the inner patterns that keep you in a cycle of stress.
- Learn mindfulness-based stress reduction techniques, proven effective by 30 years of research.
- Acquire a menu of simple, supportive and fun practices that will help you enjoy life and stay relaxed.
At the end of the course, you’ll have your own personalized stress strategy that fits your lifestyle, preferences, and time availability.
If you feel frazzled far too often, say “Yes” now and begin to learn to live with greater ease.
What does living with ease mean to you? Are you there? I would love to hear.
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