Mindfulness means far more than sitting like a like a deadweight, habitually noticing each thought as it appears in the mind.

I spent years doing that. It was the perfect way to avoid my psychological wounds. But it kept me in a revolving door made of my own patterns.

That’s why I now prefer teachers like Tara Brach, Ph.D. who know how to blend psychology and spirituality.

Brach, a psychotherapist, meditation teacher, and popular author, encourages mindful attention to your inner world in a way that accepts yet transforms difficult emotional patterns and limiting beliefs.

These five quotes from Tara Brach offer insight into the role mindfulness can play in emotional healing. I hope they inspire you.

Do You Keep Emotions Rolling?

“I recently read in the book “My Stroke of Insight” by brain scientist Jill Bolte Taylor that the natural life span of an emotion — the average time it takes for it to move through the nervous system and body — is only a minute and a half. After that we need thoughts to keep the emotion rolling. So if we wonder why we lock into painful emotional states like anxiety, depression, or rage, we need look no further than our own endless stream of inner dialogue.”―Tara Brach

Do you feed negative thoughts and emotions, extending their life, and making your emotional patterns stronger, more compelling, and more triggering than they need to be?

Think of what can happen in a minute and a half when you fuel the fire and react:

• You blast your boss and put your job in jeopardy.

• You shrink in fear and lose an opportunity.

• You put your life at risk in a moment of road rage.

Mindfulness is a powerful way to learn about your habitual reactions.

Firstly, it helps you get to know your knee-jerk reactions and gain space from them. 

Maybe you needed these reactions to survive as a child. But are they still necessary or even helpful as an adult? Mindfulness can help you look at them objectively.

Secondly, mindfulness helps you learn to pause before you react. A pause gives you time and space to make wiser choices.

Do You Allow Fear to Work Overtime?

“The emotion of fear often works overtime. Even when there is no immediate threat, our body may remain tight and on guard, our mind narrowed to focus on what might go wrong. When this happens, fear is no longer functioning to secure our survival. We are caught in the trance of fear and our moment-to-moment experience becomes bound in reactivity. We spend our time and energy defending our life rather than living it fully.”—Tara Brach

A few days ago, I arrived home from a visit to the vet. I noticed a speedy spinning sensation halfway between my navel and my heart. 

It screamed to me: “Keep going. Keep doing. Don’t stop.”

The urge felt so visceral, I almost obeyed.

But I caught myself.

I sat still in the present moment instead. I felt the spinning in the center of my torso. I felt my breath. I felt my bum on the couch cushion. 

I saw the bright blue sky and the clouds hanging in its midst.

The spinning stopped in a matter of moments. But I sat quietly for a while longer to firm up the calm.

I always get worked up when I take my cat to the vet. But why?

As Brach describes so perfectly, the emotion of fear was working overtime to create this spinning in me.

Fear I wouldn’t get the cat in the carrier. Fear I’d be late. Fear I’d get bad news once I was there.

That spinning sensation was a gift. It made me take a minute to re-evaluate the role of unnecessary fear in my life. 

I won’t suddenly become fearless. But I’m game for a less unnecessary fear. And I see how mindfulness can help me achieve that.

How much does excess fear affect your life? Or any other emotion, for that matter.

Try a Pause

“Learning to pause is the first step in the practice of Radical Acceptance. A pause is a suspension of activity, a time of temporary disengagement when we are no longer moving toward any goal. . . . The pause can occur in the midst of almost any activity and can last for an instant, for hours or for seasons of our life. . . . We may pause in the midst of meditation to let go of thoughts and reawaken our attention to the breath. We may pause by stepping out of daily life to go on a retreat or to spend time in nature or to take a sabbatical. . . . You might try it now: Stop reading and sit there, doing ‘“’no thing,’ and simply notice what you are experiencing.”—Tara Brach

Have you ever wondered how to get started with mindfulness?

• You don’t have to go on a ten-day retreat.

• You don’t have to load up on incense, buy the perfect cushion, and get singing bowls.

• You don’t have to find the perfect teacher either.

Mindfulness begins with a simple pause. Anyone can pause, it requires no advanced training.

As Brach suggests, stop right now and notice what you’re experiencing in your body, heart and mind. Notice your outer world too if you’d like.

If thoughts arise about what you find, don’t feed them. Let them slip by.

• If the birds are singing, just hear.

• If your heart feels full, just feel the joy.

• If your head is pounding, just notice the pain.

Just pause. Then pause again.

Listen to Your Inner Wisdom

“You have a unique body and mind, with a particular history and conditioning. No one can offer you a formula for navigating all situations and all states of mind. Only by listening inwardly in a fresh and open way will you discern at any given time what most serves your healing and freedom.”—Tara Brach

Once you have a teacher, whether in person or a YouTuber, you might start listening to her more than you listen to yourself. 

You might try to follow her instructions to the letter and begin to get anxious if you think you did something wrong. Conversely, you might pride yourself on being the perfect student, but never be in touch with what you specifically need.

Teachers have their place. But the point of mindfulness isn’t to learn how to be a perfect follower. The point is to connect with and listen to the your own inner wisdom.

Never surrender your spiritual authority to another person. Trust yourself.

Consider Radical Acceptance

“What would it be like if I could accept life — accept this moment — exactly as it is?”―Tara Brach

I can’t answer that question for you. But it’s a perfect reflection to share as this piece comes to a close.

What would it be like to accept this life exactly as it is?

When you answer the question for yourself, you develop an unstoppable inner motivation. Mindfulness becomes the source of your healing rather than a mechanical activity.

Concluding Thoughts

People often use mindfulness to by-pass their emotional issues.

I understand! We all want a moment of relief, don’t we?

But your emotional patterns will keep you stuck in place. They can even dominate your mindfulness practice with perfectionism, pride, or self-doubt.

You have to face your emotional wounds if you want to make progress on the spiritual path. Mindfulness can be your best help.

By mindfully observing your patterns, you’ll know what needs to heal. By applying mindfulness, you’ll learn to stop instead of repeating a pattern for the umpteenth time.

That’s how your patterns slowly lose their strength. They start to visit less. And one day, they hardly visit at all.

Thank you for your presence, I know your time is precious!  Don’t forget to  sign up for Wild Arisings, my twice monthly letters from the heart filled with insights, inspiration, and ideas to help you connect with and live from your truest self. 

You might also like to check out my  Self-Care Shop. May you be happy, well, and safe – always.  With love, Sandra