Limits: The Key to a Thriving Life

School of Fish

Trying to do too much, functioning on automatic, and/or acting out of obligation only leads to a joyless, burned out state.  You might be able to work 60 hours a week for a while, but in the end you will only damage yourself.  And, when the time comes to part with this life, you may very well be wondering, “Why did I waste my precious, limited time on the unnecessary, unimportant, or mundane?”

If you feel like your life is out of control, off track, or just “too” much, maybe it’s time to pause and consider where you can set limits.  A periodic bout of limit setting can bring improvement even when life seems to be moving swimmingly well.

The Wisdom of Limitation

Setting limits is required to live in a conscious and sane way.  Consider all the possible benefits that can come when you take the reins and become the director of your life:

  • The opportunity to focus on the activities that bring you meaning, satisfaction, and joy.
  • Receiving the greatest benefit and return on investment for your energy and time.
  • The ability to do more in less time.
  • The feeling of being in control instead of reacting to what comes down the pike.
  • More energy and less stress.
  • More time for whatever is most important to you from special work projects to relationships to leisure activities.

Three Essential Questions for Designing a Reasonable Life

How do you focus on the important and let go of the rest?  Try out these three essential questions to help you set realistic limits and design a more reasonable life.

1.  What’s Your Actual Capacity?

Some people thrive on activity while others are introverts who need introspective time.  Some are robust and others have to contend with less than stellar health.  Be honest about your capacity instead of allowing others to determine the number of hours you work, interact, play, or rest each week.

2.  What Are Your Goals and Priorities?

What is it that you truly wish to accomplish today, this month, this year, this life?  The key to setting effective limits is to have a clear vision of your priorities and goals.  Then, align your choices with your vision and set distractions aside.  Focus only on your most important goals – not more than three – rather than a long list of possibilities that may paralyze you with confusion or doubt.

3.  What Could You Limit?

Review your life for non-essential, time-wasting tasks and energy draining activities that detract from your happiness.  Explore the following arenas, ask what’s really necessary, and begin hacking away.

  • Possessions
  • Clothes
  • Work Projects
  • Social Activities
  • Social Media Engagement
  • Number of Clients
  • Healthcare Appointments
  • Blogging
  • Negative Thoughts
  • Thinking Too Much
  • Energy Drains
  • Perfectionism
  • Giving More Than 100%
  • Obligations
  • Time Wasters
  • Clutter
  • Reading – Blogs, Newspapers, Books
  • T.V.
  • Everything – Is a vacation or sabbatical in order?

What did I miss?

Setting My Limits

I’m setting limits myself.  It seems everywhere I turn I see or hear a message advising me to do just this.  My April I-Ching Report spoke of the freedom that comes for establishing limits.  Then, my April horoscope spelled it out beyond doubt:

“Limit distractions so you can shine your torch on your innermost desires.

Most importantly,  I feel this in the core of my being.  So, with this in mind, I’m taking a break this week.  You won’t see me online!

Could your life use a limit review?  Are there areas where you are taking on too much? I would love to hear your thoughts.

News: In order to “limit” my weekend activity online, I changing my main posting day from Sunday to Monday starting April 15th.  I look forward to seeing you then.

I’m so glad you’re here!  If you liked this article, please consider subscribing for free updates by email.  With love, Sandra

Image:  99of9

Stay on Track with Daily Non-Negotiables

Is it hard for you to stay on track in these speedy times brimming with non-stop demands and endless distractions?

I completely understand because I face the exact same challenge.  That’s why I was delighted to discover the idea of “daily non-negotiables”.   Setting daily non-negotiables gives me the momentum I need to stay focused and accomplish my highest priorities.

Author Charlotte Rains Dixon shows writers how to keep moving toward their goals in her article What Are Your Writing Non-Negotiables?  However, non-negotiables can be created to enhance any aspect of your life:  work, health, creativity, fitness, housecleaning, relaxation, relationships, and others.

Continue reading

Mindfulness Saves a Lot of Hassle

If you would like to reduce the many hassles that come from absent-mindedness, you might enjoy the tips in my current post at the What Meditation Really Is Blog.

Here’s the introduction:

“When was the last time you missed a turnoff, misplaced your cell phone, lost your car keys or overlooked an important detail at work?

If you counted the number of times these small errors of mindlessness occur in a single day, you might be taken aback.  In fact, a great deal of time, energy, and money can be lost through these simple mishaps of mis-attention.

Mindfulness is not just an esoteric practice for monks ensconced in Himalayan caves.  It actually has a very powerful and practical application at work and in daily life.  It can increase your effectiveness and productivity, bring more presence into your interactions, and foster more joy in your family life.”

Please continue reading at The What Meditation Really Is Blog.

Image: Public Domain Pictures (dot) Net

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